2006 Up to speed with burnt out Barbie & hen pecked Ken

Many people have read my newsletters & gone on to lead normal lives! Vol 19 2006 ©

SPEED FREAK … Ashley babe is a junior this year! … She has her learners permit and prudently uses it to out run every cop in Western PA … Whips in and out of the lanes with the truck drivers … Soda in one hand, cell phone in the other it’s a wonder she even remembers where the steering wheel is located … Sitting as her passenger on the way to early morning seminary is the high light of my day!? … Wooooosh, a little burned rubber left here and a little road kill left there … Hey, I’m signed up as an organ donor so I’ve nothing to fear – right?!! .. That’s if you like a little heart in your throat for breakfast that is!!

LEIH HOU SAI LEIH … (You are awesome)… Cameron wrapped up his adventure in Hong Kong and is a better man for having experienced a mission! … His Cantonese is incredible; one of the most bizarre sounding Chinese dialects I’ve ever heard. It’s fun listening to him chit chat with local Chinese folks and friends in the know … He enjoyed exceedingly powerful yet humbling experiences as he helped bring countless souls unto Christ … And he made a lasting impact on many … We have loved the letters, emails and phone calls from people expressing their love and appreciation for Elder Christeson … But most of all we admire and appreciate the depth of testimony he continues to cultivate and his wealth of knowledge and experience which has blessed our family as a result of this magnificent experience; but even more so we admire the incredible man in the making! … We were spoiled having him home again loving every moment of it but that ol’ revolving door of life is meant to endlessly turn so once again he is off making his mark in the world.

AHAAAAA, MY LITTLE PRETTY … A Valentine’s Day surprise for moi … An afternoon at the theater for two attending the Broadway musical ‘Wicked’ … Jon whisked me off for lunch at one of our fine dining favorites and then on to the matinee … I adored it! … Elphaba, the Wicked Witch of the West never sounded sooooo good … And holding hands with my sweetheart is about as close to Heaven as I’ll get in this life time!
Live, love, sing… Ashley inhales music like the rest of us do oxygen! … School chorus/band trip to Chicago last spring for adjudication was fab … She had a blast running around the city seeing the ‘Ferris Bueller’ (movie) hot spots and enjoying the musical ‘Wicked’ in between chorus competition … She enjoyed being in the spring musical ‘Hello Dolly’ … Is in both concert & chamber choir’s and was also selected for Madrigal choir so her days are spent in perfect harmony ... In addition, for one of her pieces at her voice recital she sang ‘Memories’ from Cats as a duet with friend Marc … It was MEOWarvelous!! … She has enjoyed several opportunities to sing solos in church and along with her daddy for our ward musical missionary open house; a very spiritual experience … She wrapped up 2006 with chorus concerts, the Madrigal dinner program & was the only female PHS student selected during district competition … Applause for Mr. Deluce, Ashley’s creatively innovative chorus teacher & mentor who guides her progress!

Now into her 4th year of private voice with Mrs. Steele, whom she adores, her technical ability and execution continue to blossom … Ash benefits greatly from Bridgett’s wisdom & expertise … With her last rehearsal at the Pittsburgh Opera under her belt and enduring a delayed flight from Chicago we finally got our little song bird home and into bed at 2:00 a.m. only to arise at 5:00 to hit the road again traveling to Ohio for the national vocal competition Bridgette enrolls her most promising students in each year… Competing a Capella in the classical and musical theater divisions with other high school and college students was incredible! … It was an eye opening experience as judges from various universities and music schools provided written critiques for each participant which was exceedingly helpful for Ashley! If a single note is not sung precisely or ones breathing or rhythm is off they catch it! … She was told that she has a beautiful voice, which we are all aware, but also specific areas wherein she can improve … She now has a divide and conquer mind set as she looks forward to next years competition at NATS!

POSITIVELY FOURTH STREET … We kidnapped Jon and headed to Cleveland to the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame for his birthday surprise! … To view the special particularly nasal Bob Dylan exhibit of course, lol … Jon the die hard Dylan fan enjoyed every electrifying moment of it! … Artifacts, film, recordings … The legend lives on … In Wayfarer sunglasses, scruffy beard and devoted fans like Jon who appreciate the man who helped influence the verb of rock.

ANCORA IMARO (I am still learning - Michelangelo) … Hey dude … He’s back in college and tirelessly training to once again return to top form once NCAA regulations have been ironed out … The UofU eliminated their men’s track team while he was on his mission so he painfully made other plans … He enjoys his classes focused on international business, hanging out with all of his returned missionary friends, other college buddies and a gazillion blond girl friends, bottle dyed and otherwise, haha … Loves being able to see family and enjoy his western roots once again … Hates not having a car and having to rely on the good will of others never wanting people to feel he is imposing - but on especially bitter, cold days it sure helps to have a ride to transport groceries; so bless the hearts of those who help him! … And of course he delights in razzing the local culture … Ski junkies, plaid shirts, campers and “Hey dude, let’s hop on the quad and go out to the sand dunes!!!” … But hey, he grew up here in the land of gum bands, Yunz and people drinking beer at the Steelers games out of their Heinz catsup caps via an IV attached directly to their liver  … So whose to say which neck of the woods is more bizarre as both have their own endearingly, unique charm!

SWEET SIXTEEN … The magic age to begin dating in our home … Wow, what a roller coaster ride it is! … She looked like a fairy princess in her tea length, powder pink tulle Homecoming gown a mid a sea of girls dressed in black … Jeans and band t-shirts rule when watching her dazzling drummer drum during a show … Running here there and everywhere with friends is great fun of course  … Guys wanting to teach her everything from dirt bike racing, down hill skiing to driving a stick shift … It’s an entertaining, wild ride minute by minute … Oh the drama of it all!

CHINA … What a surprise it was to learn that Jon would be enjoying an adventure of his own flying off to mainland China on business and a little R&R … Captivating experience! … Beijing, Shanghai and Xi’an … A country where the communist government requires all neighborhoods to participate in daily group exercise, only one child per family is still the allotted number and the entire younger populace as a whole are agnostic looking upon ones ancestors religious beliefs (Buddhism, Confucianism) as being their parents fantasies and fairy tales … Jon was mesmerized as he walked on the Great Wall, toured the Forbidden City and enjoyed exotic musical & dance performances … Dined in the lap of luxury to the polar opposite at a peasants farm on baby eel soup, fresh skinned rabbit and fish that looked liked ones worst nightmare from the black lagoon … He was spellbound by centuries of history, rich culture and a country steeped in patriotism which looks forward to opening its window to the world via the upcoming Olympic Games in Beijing … Jon brought home keepsakes consisting of miniature china tea sets for our future grandchildren, jade chop sticks and other Asian delights … It was a once in a life time experience!

YO, WALKING KEN DOLL … Abercrombie & Fitch’s mark up is easily 200 percent! … Ripped and tattered attire that sells for more than our thirty year mortgage … Folding and refolding after teenyboppers hurl their non selected rejects every which way but Sunday … But for a college guy trying to earn some bucks to pay the bills you learn to grin, pose and rack up the sales! … The opposite end of the spectrum found Cam working for a landscaping outfit on the off days … Pitching mulch, mowing lawns, pulling weeds … Hot, humid, physically exhausting … But a guys gotta do what guys gotta do - right?! … If this doesn’t convince young adults that further education in all of their forms leads one toward more rewarding and lucrative careers I don’t know what will … Oh wait, maybe dressing up like a rooster for the local fast food joint or attempting to conduct mall surveys with tired, hostile shoppers?! … Hummmm …

MAY I HAVE A BOWL OF KIBBLES WITH THAT WOOOOF … Goodness gracious, we’ve turned into those kind of people we always snickered about! … Doggie fanatics … The kind who call their pets ‘sweetheart’ and ‘snuckums’ and dress them up in bat wings for Halloween and Santa hats for Christmas … And who are clueless otherwise that the beast is an animal and NOT a human being!! … Missy Belle Buttons surely rules the roost in this chicken coop! … The Homecoming Hound dog and her mommy Ashley even wore matching pink tulle gowns ala pre-Homecoming dance lol … Well, for all of ten seconds anyway before wildly running round and round in circles in an attempt to dislodge herself from the beads and bows and frilly little tutu! … One of Ashley’s teachers commented, “How inhumane!” just kidding of course but friends thought she was kibblicious! … To bad we didn’t spring to get her hair and nails done as well 

UNSTRESSED, REFRESHED, INSPIRED but not yet RETIRED … Power Point, √ (check) … Lecture materials, √ (check) … An inordinate array of profiles, instruments, dialogues, hands on activities, visual aids, team building games, prizes and other zany motivational paraphernalia designed to challenge, educate, enlighten and entertain the masses enrolled in my professional development training workshops, √ (check) … Christeson & Assoc. continues to rock and roll training delightful employees from diverse work levels, businesses and industries! … But what I really want to know is if I will get an opportunity to do it all over again like back in the day in my twenty-something, size six, wrinkle free body minus the richer deeper voice, clear line bifocals and orthopedic shoes designed for the ‘seasoned’ female professional on the go lol ?! … Nope! … Did I hear you right? … Major downer dude!
GPA’s and SAT’s … Hey all y’all … Ash spent a wonderful week with Cam at college … She missed her brother so much we shipped her out … Attending his classes and his singles ward … Hanging with his friends … Going to a ‘Dashboard Confessional’ concert as well as touring BYU combined with a Q&A meeting with the vocal performance department while there … And of course never finding anything to eat in his apartment along with dealing with the guys mounds of dirty dishes and clutter piled sky high … But she loved it!! … She spent fun time with her cousins especially enjoying time with Brooke sharing a lot of girl talk … She had soooooo fallen in love with the college life we could hardly entice her back home! … So where will she ultimately decide to go to school? Too soon to tell … But no matter where, just click your ruby reds three times Dorothy and say, “There’s no place like home.” … “There’s NO place like HOME!! … Now just tell that to Ashley who thinks it all comes with a hassle free platinum charge card, rent free living and roommates that you will surely see eye to eye with at all times!? Haha … Wake up! … Party’s over babe … A week of pure bliss is nothing like the real thing! … Lack of sleep, cramming till 4:00 a.m. for an exam, cat fighting roomies and food fund run dry mid-month … Buy hey, one’s new found freedom and chance to explore a myriad of possibilities in life rocks so it’s worth putting up with putting up! … Isn’t that right Cam?

HERE WE GO STEELERS HERE WE GO … Steelers DONE GOOD goin’ to the Super bowl! … (Of course this season is an entirely different story?! In one word, ‘HOCKEY’!!!) It was a literal hemorrhage in the burg as everyone bleeds black and gold in Steeler territory … One for the Bus and as always everyone decked out in their football regalia swinging terrible towels! (note Jon’s picture taken with the Super Bowl trophy ) … There is nothing more fun than watching the home town boys doin’ their thang.

STRINGS & KEYS © … Cam, a lyricist in the making … He has a knack for putting pen to paper and pick to guitar string … Ash then develops the melody and sings his pop/emo music and voila, they create pure magic! … He especially enjoys writing for and then performing his music for friends … While Ash was visiting Cam they entertained college friends packed into his apartment while performing some of his original songs and some covers … What a cool, creative outlet for a brother/sister musical team who I like to call my Silver Lining … Memories à la mode.

LIFE’S THE PITTS (burgh) AND THEN YOU DIE … Attitudes are contagious but mine might kill you!! … That’ssssss it! … Jon flew off to Ft. Lauderdale on a business trip, with a little golf and a quick dip in the ocean thrown into the mix … And Ash zoomed down to North Carolina with friend Kelsey and family for fun, frolic and a major girl friend gab fest … And the pooch and I stayed home to hold down the fort … Is this fair I ask you? … No way Jose!!!!! … I’m thinking if February doesn’t find me on a beach somewhere or at a major theme park I’m pitchin’ a fit, throwing down the frying pan, abandoning the laundry, bagging the car pool and suing for back pay! … Nashville, Nantucket or Newport Beach I don’t care where … Be there or be square! … Anyone game to go?? 

LEAVE IT TO BEAVER … Oh my goodness! … It’s florescent PINK! … Jon actually painted the entire kitchen NEON, in your face PINK! … Well, sort of … It was actually supposed to be a stunning shade of barely there peach blush with one wall highlighted in a deeper shade of sunset … But I swear, it looks like it could flag down the mother ship at any moment! … ET could sure phone home from our just this side of the Las Vegas strip, mega watt, in your face, look at me I’m brighter than the noon day sun, beam me up Scotty, freaking kitchen!!!!!! … Missy adores it! … But then dogs are color blind so what does she know?! … Ashley thinks it’s meant to compete with the local ice cream parlor and Cam has decided that with just one look it’s a great place to have your head ricochet off the walls like a pin ball machine if you’re looking for a good reason to get a headache … Hey, all I can say is you LOVE the PERSON even if you DISLIKE their BEHAVIOR – right? … So what’s next for this Picasso of ours? … A bathroom done in vomit green with yo, peace man, purple haze polka dots??? …. Well, Jon your time’s up … I’m taking away your paint brush and sending you to your room without any supper! … Oh, no … better not go there or we could end up with an electric blue nose bleed bedroom highlighted with canary and cranberry trim! … On second thought, I think we’ll send Jon over to YOUR house to play for a while! … Ya think?! … PS I Looovvvvvveeeee you Jonalan & our cheerful kitchen!!

“Passionately INHALE life and EXHALE gratefulness!” © … It’s true … And we love you … Every last one of you! … Enjoy this wondrous and sacred time of the year as we celebrate our Savior’s birth. How blessed each of us are to be surrounded by dear family, good friends and religious freedom in the most remarkable country in the world!

2005 Up to speed with burnt out Barbie & hen pecked Ken

FIZZY SODA THROUGH THE NOSE MOMENTS … We wish YUNZ a Merry Christmas
Holiday Newsletter © Vol. 18 2005

OH FLIP! … Napoleon Dynamite filmed in Preston, Idaho is a twin city to Pleasant Grove, Utah where Jon and I grew up! … A nifty, dweeby, milk toast existence … Teens unaware that life existed beyond the city limits! … Hula hoops and skate keys, Pixi Stix to TV test patterns …Hunky guys, Doris Day movies, hiking up to the “G” on the mountain … 25 cents a gallon to fill up the car & a nickel for a soda … Hearing, “Do I sound like a broken record” when your mom was nagging you about cleaning your room or turning down the hi-fi … High school proms in the gym decorated with crepe paper, clotheslines in every yard, “Shhhh I’m on long distance!”, and hanging out at the Purple Turtle drive-in to grab a burger, fries and a malt … Pep club initiations, Future Homemakers of America meetings and Strawberry Day’s parades …Skirts down to your knees or you would be sent home from school for sure and later on everyone all a buzz over the newest Beatles record or the guy at school who dared to grow side burns … A real Leave It to Beaver existence … Memories of a life long ago ... Comfort food for the soul !! .. Sweeeeet – right Napoleon??!

DADDY WARBUCKS $$ ... Bonnie Boylan, alias Ashley Christeson, was a smashing success in her part as a member of the singing threesome during the high school’s spring musical ‘Annie’! ... As an Oxydent toothpaste girl who harmonized her way to radio stardom dressed in a royal blue suit and 1930’s feather hat and glove ensemble Ashley won the hearts of the radio listening audience! ... Smiling and gushing and otherwise looking endearing and obnoxious all at the same time the Boylan sister’s “doo-doodle-dooed” their way through O-X-Y-D-E-N-T ! ... “The tooth paste of the stars! To make your teeth Hollywood bright!”... And catapulted their way into the hearts of millions ... Well at least into the hearts of the ‘imaginary’ millions and of course all of the audiences at Plum Senior High School! ... “Hey hobo man, hey dapper Dan, you both got your style but brother you’re never fully dressed without a smile!”... Arf!

SAY CHEESE IN CANTONESE ... While riding the Hong Kong transit system two teenage Chinese girls sat giggling as they looked at Cameron and his missionary companion ... “juk leith sih gung” (bless your work) said one girl to Cam as they disembarked ... An old woman in an elevator said, “hou leng jai” (You are very handsome.) ... Watching a video clip while listening to a young man speaking Cantonese tell us about his conversion and of our son’s impact on his life while hearing Cam translate was incredible! ... .GO ELDER CHRISTESON !

COUPON CLIPPLING ... Pre Christmas sales, YIKES! … I take a bull horn along with me, place a dog collar with studs on it around Jon’s neck hooked to a heavy duty chain link leash and pin a sign on him that reads, “BEWARE of RABID dog! … Hey, clears the isles every time then I’m good to go! … haha ... Head em’ up move em’ out ladies, Rebecca’s commin’ through to do some serious shopping girl friends! … The only problem I can see is the probability of being pistol whipped by the mall PD, slung into a straight jacket and hauled off with the riffraff for cruelty to animals! … Hey folks, I’m only kidding! ... I LOVE this man who has a sense of humor when it comes to my zany holiday updates ... But golly, I wonder what would really happen if they knew that I ALWAYS bite the head’s off first from my chocolate Easter bunnies and animal crackers in my Barnum and Bailey box? ... Hey, we’d have a major animal rights up roar for sure!

LOVE BUG BITES ... Wow ... What a Valentine’s Day treat! ... My sweet, thoughtful Jon, with yellow roses and chocolates in hand, together with friends Leland, Ed and Peter stood in our living room; each dressed in white shirts, bow ties and jaunty barbershop style straw hats ... They serenaded me by singing, “Let Me Call You Sweetheart”, a’capella! ... Oh my goodness, can you even imagine how endearing that is for a wife! ... Yup, I stared crying as it was sooooo wonderful! ... Oh Moon doggie, does this mean that you’re asking me to go steady? ... Gidget got her guy and we’re still spooning by the light of the silvery moon thirty years later! 

GENERATIONS OF WOMEN ... What does a pre-Civil War southern plantation and an African American nanny ... A one room school house and a love for playing Chinese checkers ... An 80 year old ceramic mixing bowl and a 1940’s pill box hat and gloves ... A depression glass tea cup and a World War II Hollywood glamour shot ... A 1975 wedding veil/hat, Dick and Jane reading book and a POW bracelet ... And a pink, pint size cowboy boot and a beanie baby all have in common? ... Experiences and artifacts which knit heart to heart throughout the generations of time ... From Ashley’s 3rd generation (great-great-great) grandmother all the way down the line to Ashley herself! ... For months we spent mother-daughter time dreaming up, laughing and planning a delightful activity to be shared with the young women of our ward ... An 1800’s English tea with all in attendance dressed to the hilt ... An artifact display comprised of actual belongings of six generations of Latter-day Saint women (and one in the making = Ashley!) ... And a presentation focusing on interesting facts and trivia of each era and on each of the women in Ashley’s life who have influenced her; as a result of their commitment to their families and to the gospel of Jesus Christ ... Family history!

WHERE WERE YOU ??? ... Cam was in Hong Kong; it was his p-day so he sent us an email and was about to enjoy time with the other missionaries on an outing ... I was at home fine tuning one of my employee development training workshops and contemplating my weekly date night with Jon ... Ashley was in school counting the days until school would soon be out for summer break ... Jon was at work in meetings and anticipating the weekend ahead ... Relatively insignificant happenings for the Christeson family on this particular day - and yet that is why everything actually was so significant! ... An everyday family accomplishing every day things ... But ever cognizant of our many freedoms & blessings as Americans who have the luxury of choosing to live our lives as we see fit ... Bless our troops!

TAXI ... We gave our regards to Broadway while celebrating our 30th wedding anniversary! ... A trip to the big apple, Ashley’s first ... The bright lights and excitement of Times Square at night ... Enjoying a cool lemon ice in Central Park ... The Staten Island Ferry across the harbor to view Lady Liberty ... A look see at the FAO Schwartz toy collection ... Lunch at Jekyll & Hyde in the Village ... Subway madness a result of the London terrorist attacks taking place ... And of course a couple of Broadway musicals with all of the glitz and glamour that make being back in the city a special treat! ... Sharing a NYC street vendor’s salty pretzel, dipped in thirty years of incredible memories never tasted so good!

NOTHING BUT A HOUND DOG ... Missy Belle Buttons, newest member of our family, a little beagle with an attitude has a lengthy pedigree ... Parents are Balacera Solo and Beaver Hollow Belle ... Great-great-great grandparents are Star City Belle and Nicky Buzz Saw! ... I’m sure the latter is a little Mafia hit man beagle with an Italian bark and a submachine gun stashed in his dog house – behind the wall in the secret compartment no less?! ... Ash & Cam finally got a puppy after many long years since Bugler Beau Beagle and Jake were part of our family while living in Orem ... And how is allergic, asthmatic mom doing? Inhalers baby! ... Modern medicine has saved the day (somewhat) and I’m as smitten with this precious little critter as Ashley and Jon are! ... I’m sure Cam would have enjoyed having a Buck or a Scooter running around ... Or perhaps a Runner, Ozzie or even a Ned (like he wanted to name his own little sister when she was born!)... But alas, the doggie is a she and cute as a button!

FABULOUS FIFTEEN! ... And speaking of Ashley’s 15th birthday ... Cam sent her a beautiful, pastel blue silk Chinese dress – toggle clasps and all ... He also included a hilarious audio tape with he and the other elder’s singing a crazy birthday song as Cam accompanied them on a guitar ... They also sang a beautiful song in Cantonese and then a Primary song in English for her ... Of course he then provided brotherly advice as any terrific older brother would do which included everything from challenges to chit chat ... Hey Bret I think you’re adored in this family! ... Ya think?!

BARNEY FIFE ... Serving as first counselor in the stake Young Men’s presidency one of Jon’s many responsibilities consist of serving as a member of the teen stake dance boarder patrol ... Wahhhhhhh! … Slam em’ up against the wall, hose them down and then frisk them if the kids don’t show up with their official dance card in tow! … Oops, no bear hug dancing or brother Jon will zap you with a stun gun! … Punch and cookies? Better watch out! No spiking the frappe with a little Mountain Dew! … Try to slip out into the parking lot to sneak a little kiss – NO WAY JOSE! Jon will read you your Miranda Rights, slap the cuffs on you and haul you off to the pokey! … Golly, aren’t teenage stake dances a riot?! 

DON’T MAKE ME GET MY FLYING MONKIES!! ... Cam’s experiences in Hong Kong have been enumerable ... Hiking the tallest peaks while surveying extraordinary views below to being surrounded by monkey’s who tried to swipe their soda bottles ...Performing baptisms in natural spring rock pools to observing ancient Buddhist religious rituals ... Riding what he referred to as his ghetto, wicked witch of the west bicycle with a basket on the front to literally riding a slow boat to China to retrieve his mail ... Eating a bowl of fresh snake soup to standing at an intersection in HK, no less, called – Cameron Road! ... Life in Hong Kong has been fascinating, the work daunting yet rewarding and the blessings simply incredible! ... Tested and tried and teaching people who struggle profoundly with severe hardships and sacrifices has deeply affected him ... Cam can be very pleased with his work and the many lives he’s touched.

AHHH SHUCKS ... So I’m in the process of enjoying my little nervous breakdown crying and carrying on ... And feeling like there is so much more I could and should accomplish as a wife and mother and in life in general ... And Jon calls out from the other room, in an attempt to comfort me, “You’re great! All you need to learn to do is to replace the toilet tissue roll!” … Humph! … He always makes me laugh even when I’m in a tirade! ... xoxo

HERE COMES TREBLE ... Selected as the only freshman female to advance into concert choir during her sophomore year Ashley has enjoyed an incredible experience thus far! … A soloist during last springs chorus concert performing one of her favorite pieces from ‘Les Miserables’ to this years Madrigal Christmas dinner show ... Sing baby sing! ... Oh, and in honors English they completed their focus on Shakespeare and now on to ‘Pride and Prejudice’!!

COUNTING SHEEP … Due to sleep apnea I look like an alien space freak hooked up to my head gear, face mask and breathing apparatus some nights! … Ashley screamed in terror the first time she saw me hooked up to my new life support system and was down for the count! …I’ve sure given Darth Vader a run for his money as I inhale and exhale at an even but horrifying sounding pace … Jon’s up next for his sleep study!! ... Hey honey, you never told me middle age would be like THIS!! … Breathe in … Breathe out.

BIRTHDAY BASH! ...Happy birthday to Jon! How many guys can say they spent $8 million dollars on their birthday?!! ... Too bad it wasn’t money from the Christeson coffers! ... He took a day off from work to pursue some fun activities with us but also ended up solving a major crisis at work by phone ... Ten guesses where the money was spent? ... China! ... Rather ironic, huh.

TAKE TWO ASPIRIN AND CALL ME IN THE MORNING?! ... “Can’t you just be a NORMAL mom for once and NOT care!” haha ... Was one of Ashley’s recent pleas as I hold her to task, enforce curfews, oversee her homework, make her take her daily vitamin and the like ... As we rolled with laughter due to this uncanny comment I thought to myself, nope! ... My role as a mom is to make life perfectly miserable for my kids ... Hugs, kisses, homemade cookies, please and thank you’s, chores and church, a solid education, adventures, friends and a wide array of special privileges ... Don’t you just LOVE raising teenagers?! ... Hey Ashley Babe, ya ever hear of a little place called the Looney Bin? ... Give me another week and I’ll gladly buy my own one way ticket! haha

A BLESSING AVAILABLE TO ALL ... Cam states that to say the word endowment in Chinese is pronounced yun dough moon ... Yun, comes from the word ‘gau yun’ which means salvation; dough comes from ‘dough low’ which means road or way; and ‘moon’ means door ... So the word ‘endowment’ is like saying the door to the way of salvation ... This ordinance is paramount for all of Heavenly Father’s children upon this earth ... The key is waiting for you to open the door ... Please ask us how we may assist you.

TEE FOR TWO ...Hey ya’ll golfing buddies ... Jon spent a fabulous summer day on the links at Laurel Valley Country Club in the Laurel Highlands; another one of those exceedingly difficult days at work on the links! lol ... His foursome tied for first and Jon did the best in his group! ... He’s also enjoyed golfing Fox Chapel and Oakmont (a future repeat site of the US Open) ... With a shoulder that continually aggravates him to no end it is wonderful that he still enjoys the game as much as he does ...
F-O-RRRRRR-E !!!!

COMMUNITY EXTRAVAGANZA ... After months of planning our Plum Senior Community Center fund raiser ‘Generations of Music’ it was finally performed and well received by our audience! ... Many diligent committee members, including Ashley and I, spent a great deal of time and energy on this project ... Focusing on a family celebrating their great grandmothers birthday we intricately wove terrific vocal, dance and comedy numbers representing the various era’s of music into the story ... Everything from Big Band music to Abbot & Costello’s ‘Whose On First?’ ... Surfin’ USA to Jail House Rock ... Ashley had solos in Its My Party (and I’ll cry if I want to), Eight to the Bar (Big Band era number) and the finale Don’t Stop Belivin’ (by Journey) ... A fun, wholesome program for all ages was enjoyed by all!

CURTAIN CALL ... Ashley wrapped up her spring term of acting classes at Point Park University with her teacher Dr. Jill Wadsworth; a professor at Carnegie Mellon University ... CMU is renowned for its caliber of acting and musical theater programs where many well known playwrights, actors, directors, producers and singers have studied ... Jill teaches a wonderful workshop each spring at Point Park University wherein we were fortunate enough to discover her! ... Ashley’s particular theater company was invited by Jill to perform at a pre-college summer session consisting of students from throughout the country; the CMU conservatory is one of only a handful of serious acting conservatories in the US ... Jill opened her student’s eyes to many unique forms of theater unfamiliar to Ashley and the others such as Image Theatre and Forum Theatre which promote social change ... Ashley particularly enjoyed their invisible theater piece and found the overall experience to be very enlightening.

HOME IS WHERE YOUR STORY BEGINS … My speaking/training career evolved from home-central ... Christeson & Associates has provided endless hours of professional development training for businesses and industries over the years ... In an attempt to train employees from all walks of life and work levels as they seek to enhance their workplace skills I have come to know and appreciate a great many, fine individuals ... A special public thank you to a few of my dear friends and colleagues; Sue, Alex, Jack and Scott who have especially provided me with delightful opportunities to make a lasting impact on so many ... Kudos does not even begin to express my thanks to you in believing in my ability and in my personal vision! ... Passionately inhale life & exhale gratefulness ©

ONE OF MANY SACRED MOMENTS ... Cameron experienced a marvelous moment when President Hinckley, our Prophet, traveled to Hong Kong to dedicate the new building in Wan Chi ... A spectacular building situated in a prime location housing several chapels, classrooms, offices for the area authorities, etc ... Cam was assigned as an usher on one of the floors during this special meeting wherein President Hinckley entered the room, looked him in the eye and shook his hand ... Lay ho ... Cam indicates that it was a very moving, powerful experience ... A memory he will treasure throughout his life!

PONCHO WHERE ARE YOU? ... Jon spent a few days basking in sunny Tucson, Arizona while on a business trip ... Luxuriating at a local resort, golfing an incredible course surrounded by saguaro cactus and beautiful desert landscapes and dining at incredible restaurants ... Of course in between business meetings and listening to speakers drone on and on (yeah right)! ... A tour of the University of Arizona campus and dropping in for lunch at El Charro, a Mexican restaurant which has been operating since 1922, was a big hit! ... Chili Rellenos – bring em on! The hotter the better Jon thinks! ... Ashley and I endured a week of torrential down pours at home caused by the aftermath of the hurricane which hit Florida and endless razzing from Jon! ... Hummm, sounds like a raw deal if you ask me ... I’m thinking somewhere warm and sunny; mid-winter just might fit the bill ... Anyone interested?? ... Hey its pay back time!

HEAR THE ROOSTER CROW ... Early morning seminary rocks!! ... The youth in our ward studied the New Testament last year and Ashley feels that her love for Christ and for His teachings has grown immensely ... This year their focus has been on the Book of Mormon and Sister Salmond has once again kept them interested and challenged in order to read and ponder the Book of Mormon by years end ... However, arising every morning at 5:00 a.m. for nine months of the year in order to prepare for the day and get to class on time (?!) is always a challenge for our little gal who loves to sleep in ... Ash says Marc Kofford is her hero! ... A great friend and very patient with her dawdling haha ... Seminary and YM/YW keep our teens continually challenged and engaged in learning about Christ’s life and ministry ... And of course enjoying hot cocoa and donuts once in a while doesn’t hurt either! Beaucoup hugs to Kristi & Denise!

RAM ROD TOUGH ... Can you believe his luck?! … Not even a 12 point buck dared to jump his front end this year! … Instead it was a 16 year old female driver who rammed into the back of him last New Year’s Eve at a stop light! … She decided to gun it through a red light EVEN THOUGH Jon and others were already stopped in front of her!? … Hummm, his back end was demolished while he was plummeted directly into the woman in front of him … A peanut butter and JON sandwich! … And what was he most concerned about? His beloved Civil War license plate holder! It was crushed … Now THERE’S something to flip out about! haha

BARBIE & KEN GO TO THE PROM ... Yup, I thought he was pretty cute at age 15 life guarding at the local swimming pool ... Golden tan, chocolate brown eyes and a bright, confident smile! ... We found ourselves smitten ... Good buddies with shared memories of football games, dances, school plays and flirting in the halls between classes ... We were on again and off again like many fickle high school teenagers yet with great sincerity he told his best friend that he planned to marry me one day (though I didn’t find this out until after we were married many years and experiences later!)... Fast forward – USU campus, the 70’s bro! ... There he was again, a year a head of me in school only this time with longer hair, a beard, contacts, hippy boots and bell bottoms haha ... I lived in the ‘Morm Dorms’ no less with two best friends, was a Chi Omega chick, Angel Flight diva and Orchesis dance group fanatic ... And the beat goes on ... Until I decided to fulfill one of my ambitions of becoming GIDGET GOES HAWAIIAN leaving MOON DOOGIE to his studies and college shenanigans ... Surfs up! ... I, along with many new LDS friends discoed till dawn, tanned at Waikiki, body surfed at Waimeia and snorkeled at Hanama Bay for several months; in between working to pay our rent  ... Jon courted me from afar sending me thoughtful surprises and touching sentiments ... I sent him coconuts still in the husk and comical island souvenirs ... And then ZING after having dated a wide variety of young men through high school, college and now on the island it became as clear as a bell! ... I had ‘liked’ everyone else but was actually ‘in love’ with my best friend! ... I rushed home to the guy of my dreams and into the arms of the man who confided in his best friend that he would one day marry me! ... Patience and prayer win out we say! ... Thirty years and two incredible children, a graduate degree, a nearly paid off mortgage, a wide array of phenomenal church callings, enjoyable career success, many dear friends, interesting travels & adventures combined with a myriad of trials and tests which have helped to refine our souls and a wealth of marital insight and experiences later FRED and WILMA now continue to spoon, slow dancing to the oldies and sharing many delightful memories! ... Race you into eternity sweetheart! ... And those two ‘best friends’ lived happily ever after ... (Not) the end!

IN CLOSING ... "ngoh ngoi ngoh ge gaa tihng", I love my family, Cameron states in a recent letter ... In concluding this years newsletter let us share our son’s written testimony with you ... Each member of our family, just as millions of Latter-day Saints throughout the world, have deep and abiding testimonies of the truthfulness of the gospel of Jesus Christ ... May you enjoy a spiritual and meaningful Christmas season all year round! ... “I know that this Church is true. The witness from the Holy Ghost is my confirmation. When I teach, find, make calls and share the message of the Restoration I feel the same fire, warmth and peace that I share when I testify that Jesus is the Christ. The Book of Mormon; another testament of Jesus Christ is evidence of it all. It inspires and exhorts all of its readers to come unto Christ as does the Bible. Joseph Smith was called of God to be a prophet just as Moses or Abraham. We have a living prophet today named Gordon B. Hinckley, whom I have shaken hands with; when I did so I felt the spirit of God course into me. What a comfort it is to know that not only did God call prophets in ancient times but also today to lead and guide his children in a world of ever changing values. The power to seal a family together forever is once again on the earth. Truly the fullness of the gospel has been restored, and I add my humble testimony that this is true. Jesus is the Christ, and I echo His invitation to all “fear not, but only believe.”

2004 Up to speed with burnt out Barbie & hen pecked Ken

THIS LETTER ARRIVES WITH A WARNING FROM THE SURGEON GENERAL … “Beware, may cause drowsiness!” On the other hand you may get a chuckle or two as you read about another bizarre year in the Christeson home!? Be sure to “Take with food or milk” and keep in mind that “Failing to finish this read may be hazardous to your health!” Rx Yeeee-haaaaaa!

DECK THE HALLS … In a world filled with tiny, white, sparkling outdoor Christmas lights we continue to hang our gargantuan, multi-colored Easy Bake Oven bulbs! … They’re big, bold, colorful and GHASTLY! … But hey, some traditions never cease even IF they were the first string of lights we began hanging on our new home in Orem, Utah some 27 years ago! … Perhaps it’s time to retire these retro old fogy’s to the archives?! …Sell them on e-bay?! … Donate them to the Smithsonian … Or better yet, haul them off to the Kennedy Space Center as a pulsating set of Bee Gee’s disco style runway lights! Ya think?! … Any takers out there?

GEEZERS … If his daughter wasn’t always telling him his mode of dress is, “soooo yesterday!” and his music is “soooo Jurassic!” and his suggestions are “soooo vintage!” and his jokes are “soooo third grade” then he wouldn’t realize that he’s actually IN the zone dude! … Peace man! … Power to the people! … Grooooovy! … Those psychedelic 60’s rock bro! … Or at least his flower power wifey-chick thinks so! … The reason parents are put on this earth is to irritate and embarrass their kids! … Right?! … Yo Ashley – one day we’ll say grandchildren are our reward for having not strangled our teenagers! … And yup, we love you a bushel and a peck babe! … You’re “soooo middle earth!”

RUNNERS HAVE SOLE … Having lettered in XC Cam now sports a cool red and white University of Utah Letterman’s jacket … Was red shirted for spring track running unattached achieving his goal in the 800 at the BYU invitational … Enjoyed a 5-K here and there and was committed to grueling, daily training no matter what the weather snow or shine eleven months a year … Some 6 am runs, classes from 7-12 then weight training, swimming and more running again till 5 pm before any evening classes not to mention travel and meets … Certainly not the overall college students schedule … All he needed was to walk around with a hip looking swagger in a pair of cool shades greeting everyone he passed with a, “Hey - wassup” and then go postal joining a Greek fraternity and he would have become the stereotypical college jock! … Nope, I don’t think so … We know the hard work and passion of a runner! …Ten thunderous cheers for diligence and dedication! … After his two year hiatus in China, watch out 2006 as he may return to the sport with a vengeance … Or on second thought perhaps he will continue to enjoy a little competitive volleyball and run just for fun!?

MAKE DESTINY NERVOUS … As Ashley would say … But we might use other descriptive terms such as outstanding, hilarious, captivating and simply entertaining to describe last springs musical “Guys and Dolls”! … But then the female lead was none other than ASHLEY BRETLYN CHRISTESON! …70 students auditioned, 30 received parts and all had the time of their lives! … Bret and Brett (male lead) stole the show and Mr. Steele and Mrs. Miller received accolades for their creative insight, direction, set designs, costumes, choreography, lights, music and action!! … What a delight it was to see the cast hold the audience spell bound and rolling in their seats with laughter … And how remarkable that a musical director of such talent, vision and patience cares enough to help each student enjoy a positive experience from the first cold reading to the final production! …Of course we all sat on the edges of our seats as we anticipated the illustrious stage kiss between the characters of Sarah and Sky (he kisses her/she slaps him)! …And Ashley loved being showered with bouquets of flowers including a dozen glorious powder pink roses from her daddy! …I surprised our shooting star with helium balloons, our front door covered with stars, a special book to add to her personal library and of course a box of “Hostess Ding Dong’s” (in commemoration of one of her solo’s that goes ”If I were a bell I’d go ding-dong-ding-dong-ding” ) … My wacky sense of humor kicking in haha … All in all it was a delightful performance from our beautiful budding actress and profoundly talented vocalist … Ok, play times over Ash - head out of the clouds … Go get your chores done … NOW!

STAND TALL AND FLUFF YOUR PINK FEATHERS … I turned 50 this year! … In celebration I flew to Utah and escorted our son to the MTC! It doesn’t get any better than that! … Pure icing on the cake of life! … Reflecting on my many blessings I earnestly continue to enjoy a remarkable, loving relationship with my precious husband and children … Possess an unwavering testimony of the gospel of Jesus Christ … Enjoy true, devoted friendships … Challenging and creative opportunities for personal growth both in and out of our home … And whimsical events and happenings on any given day … I give sincere thanks to my Heavenly Father! … Hey, every day is a tiara day in my book! …

RUBBER DUCKY … It all began with a little yellow rubber duck with an attitude! … QUACK! …Sporting a blue beak and sunglasses no less! … Cam and a friend passed the little plastic fellow and a disposable camera back and forth from coast to coast snapping pictures of Harley where ever he traveled! … The duck visited Ohio, Indiana, Illinois, Nebraska, Colorado, Missouri, South Carolina and has the grin to prove it! … Hanging out on mountain peaks of sheer granite, enjoying pancakes at stop and go diners, and perching on road signs from the mid west to desert country … Little H has really made the rounds! … One glitch – he rode to California in the back seat of a Chevy never to be seen again … But wa-laa, mom and Rubberducky.com to the rescue! … Harley’s rough and tumble cousin Zeto, from the Bronx, took his place flying off to Texas and traversing Jersey! … Now he has a whole house full of family! … Punk rock duck for Ashley, 60’s hippy duck for dad, queen duck for mom and brothers running duck and computer duck for Cam (all painted to the nines in their respective theme attire of course) …When will it all stop?! … QUACK! … Duck mania … I never knew a duck I didn’t like! …QUACK QUACK … Rubber ducky you’re so fine … Enough all ready!

PRETTY IN PINK … Selecting room colors from paint chips with dad was torture! … Do you KNOW how many shades of pink there are in the world?! … End result dazzling! … A daddy-daughter date having fun painting and redecorating Ashley’s teen-scheme room … Ash learned new skills and achieved another qualified goal toward earning her future Young Womanhood Recognition Award! … In the mean time she gets to veg and study in the room of her dreams!

LA VITA E’ BELLA (Life is good) … France, Norway, South Africa, Mexico, China, Russia, Kazakhstan, Brazil, Venezuela, Canada, Iceland, Ukraine, Netherlands, United Kingdom, Argentina, Peru, Bolivia, and Indonesia read like settings of an exciting novel of mystery and intrigue… However, as Jon negotiates with and purchases commodities from each exotic location he realizes even more profoundly the importance of strong foreign relations on all levels of business … That the global marketplace is an ever active web of commerce and communication … That as Americans we have a responsibility and the privilege of coming to understand and show respect for other diverse cultures while setting an example of solid business practices and personal ethics … So just HOW difficult is it HONEY to lounge on the beach near Boca after an exhausting day of conducting meetings with the masses?! … So WHEN is it that you go to lunch again with those two French guys, SWEETHEART?! ... WHO sends you that lovely basket of Italian delights DEAR?! … Just another grueling year at work in the concrete jungle! … Isn’t that RIGHT, SUGAR POPS?! … Just kidding – promise! … Golly, I sure think that 401(k) is worth the TEDIUM and SACRIFICE, don’t you BUBBLE CAKES?!

SILVER SPURS … Cam’s anticipated John Wayne, OK Corral, cattle drive, bunk house type of outings while visiting with college friends in Wyoming and Montana were not to be … Sage brush, leather chaps, gun slinging, chuck wagon moments were all part of the old west ambiance of days gone by …Now McDonalds, K-marts and strip malls dot the landscape where once lonesome cowpokes could be found playing their gee-tars under the stars while listening to a lone coyote baying in the distance … Hey, WAKE UP- DREAMS OVER! …So Cam’s a preppy East coast kid with an over active imagination! … The illusionary romantic myth of the West continues … Hey, pass me the branding iron and that bottle of Barbeque sauce will ya Festus?

STAGE FRIGHT … Pieces from Die Zauberflote, Cosi Fantutte, and Jekyll & Hyde were performed as part of Ashley’s voice recital … But a duet dressed in a Japanese kimono for Madame Butterfly sung in Italian, and milk maiden attire for her Sound of Music solo were our favorites!! … And of course a swingy little number from Anything Goes with friend Marc was Delovely! …So how did Bridget, her brilliantly talented voice teacher, pull off such an incredibly, choreographed recital? … Pure chutzpa! … This extravaganza had Bridget Steele’s artistic vision written all over it! … How blessed Ashley is to have a teacher and mentor who continually challenges her, holds her to task, as well as delights over her achievements! … Ahhhhhhhhh 

CHOCOLATE MADE OUR SHIRTS SHRINK … Humph! … In spite of grueling eighty mile runs every morning before 3:00 a.m. … Drinking ONLY power drinks and eating 1.5 carbs per day … Doing yoga to relax and using crystals, magnets and fish hooks to tap into our undiscovered energy reserves we still can’t seem to fit into those size 23-36 Levi jeans and capped sleeved muscle man t-shirts … What’s wrong with us?! … Middle age spread? … Of course not! It’s that new detergent that smells a lot like Hershey’s chocolate that’s the culprit!! ... Hey, passing the buck is the American way of late – right?! … No can do ... It’s our fault! … Having a hidden 7-11 in our bedroom and lack of resolve is the culprit! … Maybe … Or maybe not?! … Jon has already dropped 35 pounds and I take a FIRM stand SHOUTING at those Hershey bars to STAY AWAY from me! … Ummmm-ummmm, don’t mess with THIS hot mama!

GIVE BLOOD PLAY GOLF … Then wrap your club around a tree a few times, pitch a fit in the sand trap and ram your golf cart into the front window of the pro shop and THEN everyone will surely know you played a great round of golf that day! … It’s a beast! … But pure relaxation Jon says … Yeah right!

BUTTERFLY KISSES AND VELCRO HUGS … Seeing Cam off at the airport in route to the Missionary Training Center in Provo (one of several throughout the world) and then on to Hong Kong to serve the Lord for two years as a full time missionary was thrilling but also one of the most difficult moments we’ve experienced as a family! … Our group hugs and family prayers began years and years before this expected event occurred! … Emotional, nevertheless … Jon and Ash clung to “the guy” smothering him with kisses, last minute advice and best wishes … Unexpectedly flying first class, however, Cam and I still had part of the journey to experience together so my final farewell would come two days later … I suppose only Latter-day Saint parents can fully understand this when I say that we literally have no qualms with regard to Cam living and serving on the other side of the world … It’s a remarkable privilege to be deemed worthy in all respects to serve a Mormon mission … It requires faith, sacrifice, courage, diligence, preparation, integrity and a desire to stand up to the plate and share Christ’s message with those who, likewise, have the insight and yearning to learn the truth … The LDS missionary program is run like a tight ship being exceedingly well organized … Missionaries rock! … And Elder Sung (Christeson) is making a profound impact on the Chinese people through the power of God … Yes, we miss him terribly but we also know that this is exactly where he is to be and chooses to be at this time in his life! … To understand more about how and why close to 60,000 missionaries choose to serve LDS missions throughout the world please go to www.lds.org

TICKLE, TEASE & TORMENT … “I’ve never had to wonder what it’s like to have an obnoxious little brother- I have a DAD!” … Per Ashley … Case closed … Well, not quite! … Too bad he can no longer tease his brother Kurt to death and Cam’s off the hook for now, so Ashley Babe … TAG … You’re it! … GO DAD – GO DAD!!!

THE MAN THE MYTH THE LEGEND … It’s a weed whacker story …We should erect a 10 foot sign with flashing lights that reads; THIS LAWN HAS BEEN PAINSTAKINGLY MOWED FOR YOUR SCENIC ENJOYMENT (and by reason of “our” insanity) by Jon Alan Christeson landscape design extraordinaire! ... Between the gophers that pop up out of no where and the cottontail bunnies that feast on his patches of newly replanted lawn I think he is about to start hanging out in the dark dressed in full battle fatigue with a spot light in hand and a shot gun filled with buck shot ready to attack! … It’s ok dear, calm down … Take my advice and stick my tacky, plastic, pink flamingo lawn ornaments back in the middle of the yard and that should scare those critters away! … Little does he know I coerced the enemy to make mincemeat of the lawn! … This way he just might give up out of sheer desperation forgetting about his pruning and planting, edging and mowing and whisk me off on a romantic get away! … Fat chance!! … But NEVER under estimate the creativity of a woman! … I am woman hear me roar! … Hey Jon, did you know there’s a cool SALE on fertilizer in TAHITI – I’ve got two tickets, we leave TOMORROW! … “Let us be grateful to those who make us happy, they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.” Marcel Proust

ANNOY THE MASSES … Woo-hoo! … Ash hit the halls of Plum High School cruising!! … She enjoys French, honors English, geometry, IPS, history and chorus but let’s forgo any thought of competitive swimming shall we?! … Drivers’ theory and career exploration are ok but BOYS are obviously far more interesting! … She loves her Young Women’s lessons and activities and serves as first counselor in her class … She’s devoted to early morning seminary (scripture study at the church) but hauling myself out of bed each morning at 4:30 am in order to prepare and then get her up and there on time is precarious at best, but starting her day out on such a spiritual high makes it worth the effort! … Now being old enough to attend stake dances is cool and having learned to swing dance as well as hanging out with all of her LDS girl friends is great fun … Cuisine club, being a math tutor and serving as secretary of the French Club keeps her hopping as does instant messaging on the computer and endless girl chit chat on the phone with her circle of cohorts … She auditioned for the school play and received a part as a comical Hillbilly hick havin’ a hooten hollerin good ol’ time Y’all! (A darling guy friend wrote on her program, “Perfect light was formed in your beauty, yet fails to do you justice” Sweet!) In addition, being selected for the female solo and a duet in our stake Christmas cantata was a superb way to usher in the holidays! … She continues to inhale life at the speed of light and the experiences we enjoy with our drama queen teen is the ride of a lifetime!

GENTLEMEN START YOUR ENGINES … They’re lined up at the starting gate! … Compliments on her beautiful (braces-less) smile, her decidedly hot (yet modest) attire or the scent of her luxurious (no longer pig tailed and braided) hair … It’s amazing what an inexpensive bottle of shampoo can do for the male psyche! … The guys are chomping at the bit … Only two more years until she can date … Don’t worry Cam, you’re dad has your sister under house arrest until she’s 35! … Boys are stupid! Throw rocks at them! Be sure and aim! … That’s her dad’s motto!

PASS THE BUCK … As you are aware in 2002 Cam annihilated Blitzen, 2003 Jon pulverized Rudolph and 2004 we girls discoed with Bambi missing him by a sigh … of relief that is! … We WON!! … And he made it in time for his zippy little rendezvous with Felene and Thumper! …. Not even a dent! … Girls’ rule!! … Go girls … Go girls!

CHINESE CHECKERS … Neih hou? (how are you) … Cam did reside in the Tsim Sha Tsui area of KowloonTong, Hong Kong which boasts the exotic tourist area with beautiful hotels and incredible views of Victoria Harbor to the flip side entailing hole in the wall shops where the smell of raw fish reeks and pig’s feet, intestines & spine are purchased daily for consumption! ... Six million people chattering Cantonese & Mandarin rushed here and there as Elder’s Christeson & Croizer attempted to share the gospel with whoever was willing and ready to learn! … Cam’s Cantonese continues to improve but his dislike of eating squid including the head and tentacles has not become a favorite of his! … YIKES! … Run for your life Cammy! … (Listening to him bare his testimony in Cantonese on a tape he sent us was very moving! It’s an odd sounding language considered to be one of the worlds most difficult to learn. Each word spoken may take on several different meanings based on various vocal tones) … He now resides on the small island of Lantau in Mui Wo which is more jungle like and rather than greet others with a hearty “hello” they say, “Have you had your rice yet?” and baptisms take place in the ocean in a small cove … His cousin Dave from Logan, Utah is now his zone leader which thrills him! … Cam has met intriguing people and had some incredible experiences including; baptisms, ward activities, HK temple sessions, teaching free English classes, teaching people how to pray for the first time in their lives to getting lost for a few hours but finally making it home! … I discovered that one of the busiest streets in HK is “Cameron Road” which boasts a terrific noodle shop which offers ho ho (very good) deep fried octopus fish ball noodles! YUM! … He is fearless in talking with and teaching people the gospel of Jesus Christ and has a deep love and concern for the Chinese people … President and Sister Ong (his mission president and wife) are remarkable people whom Cam holds in high regard … Missionaries are allowed one hour each week to email their families from local libraries (they may hand write letters to anyone without restriction) so we look forward to Cam’s descriptive letters which are always filled with the sights, sounds and the interesting lives of the Chinese people … Knowing that our tall, blond, blue eyed son is teaching people who practice Buddhism, Confucianism, etc., about Jesus Christ simply melts my heart! … Ngoh ngoi neih Cam! (I love you) … Check out his website to read portions of the letters he sends home which I post for all to enjoy … www.missionaryworld.com/christeson

THE THEORY OF RELATIVITY … Ash to earth … “Hey, I’m doing my research paper on ADD and I was looking through the list of topics and I was like; teenage suicide, maybe … abortion, nah … depression, sure why not … multiple personalities, heck yeah … schizophrenia, definitely, and then I saw ADD and I was like THAT’S MY TOPIC!” … I can ADD and subtract – no brainer! … Research paper here I come! … Note from mom: Hey earth to Ash, you’re in honors classes. And HOW did you arrive at this point?! haha … (And THIS ONE I couldn’t have come up with in a million years! It was taken verbatim from an actual phone conversation she was having with a friend! )

DARE TO DREAM … Reflecting on his freshman year at the University of Utah Cam sees his experience as being “running Ute positive!” … Biology, psychology, finance and college writing were some of his classes … He had some interesting professors and enlightening discussions … Home teaching with friend Matt as his companion, weekly ward prayer meetings (speakers & socializing), innovative Family Home Evening activities and singing in the choir of his student ward kept him in good cheer … Sorority formals, return high school proms and running about all over the Salt Lake and Utah Valley’s with his friends Tim, Kurt, Matt, Colby and Ivan made for some memorable college moments … Playing his guitar, composing music and writing lyrics was the icing on his de-stress down time and having to survive living his first semester with an obnoxious roommate who tried his patience but tempered his resolve preparing him for his future mission wherein living with a myriad of rotating missionary companions will either be a treat or a challenge, haha, rounds out his year … Living 2,000 miles away from home for the first time, from all that was near and dear, while learning to make significant decisions, effectively manage his time -or not, commit to the completion of important goals and endure moments of loneliness helped to further shape the man in progress … Soooo, we’ve reared you in a home filled with love, affection, challenge and accountability Cam … We cut the cord and you not only flew but you SOARED! … You’ve achieved two of your life long dreams; beginning college and serving a mission … Now as you read this recap of our combined, albeit zany, Christeson year while residing at the far ends of the earth in China we applaud you as you continue to choose to thrive! … All possibility awaits you … How profoundly blessed we are to be your family and to continue to share in your magnificent opportunities and adventures! … You wrote us, “Yeh Sou Gei Duk ngoi ngohdeih ge gaatihng tuhngmaih Sung Jeunglouh dou ngoi ngohdeih” … Indeed! And we love you too! …Continue to make a positive impact wherever your travels may lead you Sung Jeung louh … God be with you till we meet again … See you in July 2006! … You’ll recognize us - we three will be the ones standing on the corner of 2 Cornwall Street in Kowloon Tong, Kowloon, Hong Kong waiting for you and wearing GRINS that reach from “there” to America! XOXO, Mom

IN A BLINK OF AN EYE … 2003 actually concluded with Cam flying home from college for 2 weeks during the holidays sporting long hair and looking a tad bedraggled! … Parties, outings, dates, fun and dragging a gigantic duffle bag home FILLED with dirty laundry to boot! … Pull-ease! … 2004 found Valentines arriving, postmarked from throughout the country; Romance, AR, Loving, NM, Valentine, TX … Cam was invited, with friend Tim, to usher at General Conference (behind the scenes is fascinating!) … Jon’s repeat cross country road trip back and forth to Utah and spring break activities in Wash DC were a lot of fun, especially escorting Cam to the Washington temple for his endowments was a very sacred experience! … Staying with our friends the Fultz’s enjoying combined family activities and also a day at Hershey for the teens was terrific and finally hosting our son’s missionary farewell luncheon was a delight … My mom’s trip out here for a visit, Ashley’s long awaited 14th birthday party at Kennywood amusement park, in addition to providing my employee development training workshops with a twist for a variety of diverse industries and Jon’s white knuckle driving attempting to outrun the floods while in Virginia caused by hurricane Ivan round out some of this years here there and everywhere highlights … Also attending plays, the Trans’ Siberian Orchestra performance and sharing hot buttered popcorn while making out at the movies on other date nights also reflect our over the hill with an attitude activities! … Now we settle in as we once again celebrate the holidays and pause to reflect on our many blessings … Our life is always filled with a little intrigue and adventure the likes of which our grandmothers would never have believed. But I happen to see this as a great and wonderful blessing! … To be living in a time of limitless choice and outstanding opportunities is exciting and humbling … And speaking of grandmothers, Ashley is working on a captivating YW artifact and written history project she’s devised focusing on five maternal generations of incredible women who have influenced her life in distinct ways! … GO Ash!! … Her tribute will serve as a legacy to all generations of women … “All that I am or ever hope to be I owe to my angel mother.” Abraham Lincoln

AMERICAN GRAFFITI … PS … Reflecting on the past five decades Jon and I have seen everything from pixie sticks, black cows, fizzies to Mentos … Chatty Cathy, Barbie, Cabbage Patch and Hula dolls … Howdy Dudy, Leave It To Beaver, Brady Bunch, Seinfeld and reality TV … Spin the bottle, Twister, Clue and Paint ball … Meat loaf, Spam sands, TV dinners and Big Macs … Chevy’s with fins, Mustangs with a stick and fully loaded mini vans … Rompers, mini skirts, granny dresses and power suits … Pageboys, pig tails, the flip and the shag … Barnaby Bumbleberry, Dick and Jane, Nancy Drew, and Tom Clancy ... Blow dryers, calculators, microwaves, cell phones, and the internet … Love beads, pet rocks, mood rings and POW bracelets … Primary songs, soul, rap, alternative and disco … Schwins, skate boards, roller skates and Harley’s …Bambie, Beach Blanket Bingo, Rocky and The Lord of the Rings … Dolls, babes, chicks, Mrs., and Ms. … Sledding, hot-dogging, snow boarding and extreme skiing …Ten p.m. curfews, front porch lights flicking on and off repeatedly, caller ID and, the Miranda Rights … Cool, groovy, hey, yo, and givemesumskin … Glass ceilings, stone pillows, black ice and golden sunsets … Dot to dot, play doh, glitter glue and clip art … Milk men, ice cream trucks, pizza delivery and take out … Slinkies, action figures, Lego blocks and Baby Einstein … Double dates, blind dates, no dates and goin’ steady … Tupperware, Band-Aids, Kleenex and, Swifer … Line dancing, the hokey pokey, the bump and pirouettes … Bryl Cream, Aqua Net, Sun In and Grecian Formula … Golly, 50 years and counting! … Through thick and thin … Together forever … When God made you He was just showing off babe! … So are you ready for another twirl on the ol’ merry-go-round of life?! … It’s true you know … “LIFE is an EXTRAORDINARY adventure”!

“Passionately INHALE life and EXHALE gratefulness!” ©

We wish you a “ho ho” (very good) holiday season - “Ngoh ngoi leih” the Christeson’s love you!

May the light of Christ enrich your life and bless you throughout the New Year

And hey, we won’t wait up … but we’ll sure keep our hot pink neon flamingo light on for ya!

2002 Up to speed with burnt out Barbie & hen pecked Ken

Attempting to bring you, the reader, up to speed with burnt out Barbie and hen pecked Ken's lives (just kidding) will be my goal; at least those of you attempting to escape long, tiresome nights of insomnia who actually enjoy reading overly newsy blogs like this one. We'll begin in 2002 making our way through the choices and challenges a family experiences throughout the year.

Put your feet up, poor yourself a cup of hot cocoa, prop those eye lids open with a couple of tooth picks and let's goooooooooo ...

(Note: During the holiday season each year we share zany family newsletters with friends and family. The following are excerpts from letters beginning in 2002.)

SPIKES … By now you know that running is one of Cam’s passions! … At the Baldwin track Invitational he placed 8^thth, broke a 27 year old record in the mile for Plum High School and qualified for states!… He feels honored to be ranked as one of the top 25 male HS milers in Pennsylvania especially since he only began competing in the 1600 last spring …You run white boy! medaling in the 1600 … At WPIALS (state qualifiers)

SKY HIGH … Ashley graduated from elementary with honors and was accepted into all of the enriched classes in junior high (math, English, reading) she adores the myriad of opportunities, friends and activities available … She enjoys being a member of the Reach Out service club, Pep Club, having been selected for chorus and named Female Art Student of the month and a math hustler … Also, the boys keep getting better looking every day and Coach I is her math teacher … Does it get any better than this for a tween?! …

FOLLOW THE LEADER … Awarded “Outstanding Male Runner Of The Year” and senior captain of a 50+ member cross country team Cam and the Running Mustangs enjoyed a very productive season! (check out their web site at http://www.runningmustangs.org/) … Running in densely wooded, intensely hilly terrain challenges the runners continually … If raw, bleeding feet don’t kill ya then dry heaves, muscle cramps, dehydration and the weather might! …. The pack; Cam, Nick, Chris, Mike, Wade and the others are now excitedly running winter track and looking forward to making their mark at WPIALS at the conclusion of spring track! … Hey Coach C we appreciate your leadership and support!

LIFE BITES! … Pain and suffering, torment and turmoil … Ashley’s new “Hannibal Lector” look (braces) took some getting used to but her new contact lens are a go! … The removal of Cam’s impacted wisdom teeth required pampering … Poor baby … And he annihilated Blitzen on the turnpike at 70 mph detailing his car big time! …Jon’s aggravating allergies and sinus infections, which we blame on the Cicada season, (unusually noisy insects which torment Pittsburghers every seven years!) …Combined with my 26 weeks in a fiberglass boot up to my knee – now back in it again in addition to severe eye problems – I don’t think the “Helen Keller” look quite becomes me yet! …Now with ugly orthopedic shoes and cane in hand I stroll baby! … All has compelled us to count our many blessings and be grateful that we weren’t also hit by mud slides, mine fires burning under areas of Pittsburgh, sniper attacks or yapping little dogs! … Don’t just make lemonade - make it with a TWIST! … That’s our motto! …

HIRED HELP … Jon excitedly transferred back to the corporate offices in down town (or duntun as locals say) … Changes and challenges are good for the soul! …Now parking his new truck only to hop public transportation, once again, provides him time to indulge in one of his distinct pleasures - reading … AND he gets to meet the most quirky underbelly of society! … Cross dressers, thugs, conversation monopolizers, crack addicts and politician wannabes (Too harsh?! Perhaps a tad over the top but you’d be surprised at his bizarre experiences!) …He also enjoys spending millions of dollars $$$$$$ of the companies money …Too bad it’s on ferro alloys rather than Carnival cruises, Kentucky derbies and shopping sprees with his wife!

JET LAG … The host state of this years spectacular winter Olympic Games found us flying overhead, in various family member combinations, on four different trips from April thru August … Enjoying the view of the magnificent granite cliffs below we were, thereby, ushered into our beloved home state of Utah for Jon’s fathers funeral, vacation and college tours, running camp and visits with family and friends … The Fackrell, Christeson and Hansen cousins made our trip a joy!! … And dining at favorite haunts like Mkt. Street Broiler near the U of U, Brick Oven by BYU, and Club Rodeo (yeah right?!) at USU … Oh, I remember now … USU where Jon and I cracked the books, pulled sorority pranks and cut classes to go to the UB is the only college with a football field that turns into a stock yard for cattle shows and students throw tortillas at you during half time! ... Just kidding USU alums! … But by golly I shur do miss that row-day-o club!

BUMBLE BEES … And I thought spelling bees appealed only to kids who found memorizing the dictionary fascinating?! … Articulate, veracious reading Ashley was named building champion of her school going on to the district bee at the University of Pittsburgh where she then made it into the Western Pennsylvania finals! … Spell otorhinolarynologist Ash - or do not pass

go, do not collect $200!

HEART STRINGS … On the home front my family has cheerfully and unselfishly gone beyond the call of duty in attempting to help me regain my health! …It is profoundly humbling being the recipient of such an inordinate amount of service! … With Jon tending to all of the grocery shopping for the past two years, and divvying up the laundry and other miscellaneous chores with Cam, while Ashley plays Cinderella moping floors and cleaning bathrooms I have benefited greatly from the tender loving care which is bestowed on me daily by my family! … My heart weeps as well as sings and I never take for granted the precious bonds enjoyed by a family who attempts to provide Christ like service for one another without fan fare or reward! … Of course that is minus a few well deserved gripes and groans from the labor force! … They’re only human you know!

…

STAR LIGHT, STAR BRIGHT … Cam flew solo for the first time cross country to attend a high altitude running camp, outside of Evanston, Wyoming, at Big Muddy, with recruits and team members from the University of Utah track team … Sleeping near the camp fire under the stars was a breathtaking experience! … If you’ve never been out west and seen the heavens at night away from city lights you ain’t lived pardner! … Having difficulty inhaling oxygen while running at such a high altitude was daunting … Receiving training by a coach who has vast experience coaching Mexico’s Olympic track team, and other Olympic athletics from around the world, was a supreme privilege! … Making numerous friends with similar values who likewise believe in being morally clean, spiritually focused and academically driven was a real treat … Combined with rugged outdoor “guy” fun and finding ones connecting flight was cancelled, after arriving in Chicago dead tired, made the trip an experience of a lifetime! (Hardly a hint!? … RED … ROCKS! … GO UTES! … Olympic Village = Cam’s dorm … Near Temple Square!)

CATS LEAVE PAW PRINTS ON YOUR HEART! … Unless you’re the mom who ca-choos, snorts, hacks and endures the misery of cat dander and intensely dislikes the sneaky, emotionally distant little critters and secretly wishes them ALL ill will or better yet a date with the glue factory! (Yikes – did I really DARE fess up to that?! Ash will make me pay BIG time!) … However, the Broadway musical “Cats” was once again spectacular! … And Ashley’s 12^thGarfield” as my workshop mascot is tolerable! … BUT don’t even think for a moment, little Missy, that I’m about to tolerate the clutter of dreadful litter boxes in my house and fur balls under my sofa! … NOPE I’m on a personal mission …. Calico cat tire treads sound pretty good to me! …. Siamese stroganoff might not be all that bad! … And alley cat hood ornaments just might make my day!…. Cat lovers beware … I have a BB gun hidden in my shrubs, arsenic treats just waiting to be served, a burlap sack and a river 12 feet deep near by!!! … Oh NO, here she comes running down the hall toward me with a grizzly look of menace on her face! … It’s my daughter the CAT LOVER … Help! …Hiss! … Meow! … Tune in next year for the continuing saga of Felix the Cat, minus his limbs, just went AWOL! … Or was this all a dream? Another one of Rebecca’s endless fantasies? … HA – gotcha! birthday with a “Kitty Kake” theme was delightful! … And using “

WHAT A WASTE OF A GOOD MAKEUP DAY! … Not! … Christeson & Associates experienced a terrific year! … I secured many delightful contracts wherein I facilitated various corporate management training and employee development workshops for diverse businesses and industries … Using pop rocks, play doh and monkey masks to illustrate serious concepts wrapped in fun gets them every time! .. I have been very fortunate to have met many incredible people from all work levels who have blessed my life as I learn as much from them as they do from me … Accolades to friends Alex and Sue! … My giant cardboard take along friends; the Three Stooges, Wicked Witch of the West and ELVIS also thank you, thank ya very much!

GET AROUND, GET AROUND, I GET AROUND … Ashley enjoyed a three day trip with all her school friends to our state capital in Harrisburg, a historic tour of Gettysburg including a ghost walk at dusk by candle light throughout the town while being told of startling accounts of Civil War soldiers who continue to linger amid the ruins of the battlefield … Also, Hershey’s Chocolate World tour looked and smelled pretty delicious! …She enjoyed attending her first Pittsburgh North Stake Young Women’s girls camp (housed in cabins in a setting much like that featured in the old Disney movie Parent Trap) while cultivating diverse skills, hiking and swimming in the lake, enjoying crafts, participating in riotous antics and embracing spiritually uplifting moments … Also, her trip to the Washington DC temple with our wards Young Men and Young Woman’s group was a delightful experience! … Another 1^st included a stake YM/YW festive fall activity including a hay ride, games, activities and fun with friends! …Getting older sure has its perks!

SERVICE WITH A SMILE … Cam currently serves as 1^st assistant in his Priest’s Quorum and is soon to become a 4^th year seminary graduate … It has been such a privilege and a pleasure to serve as one of Cam’s seminary teachers! … He continues to work toward earning his Duty To God award and attests to having enjoyed one of the most spiritually edifying stake YM/YW temple trips and testimony meetings ever! … Jon continues to serve on the High Council now assigned as the liaison for the Pittsburgh Fourth Ward … He also oversees the stake Public Affairs committee wherein he worked on an interesting bi-stake project helping to promote the LDS church’s release of the 1880 US & 1881 Canadian census for all people throughout the world who want to trace their genealogy no matter what their religious affiliation … I was recently released as the stake Activities Director, a calling I thoroughly enjoyed! Planning diverse activities, food and entertainment for hundreds of members and guests was a creative thrill bar none! … Jon, Jim & Kate L. and John & Ginny F along with a host of others helped me create magic!

ROAD TRIPS … What a life for a teen! … Trips to Cedar Point Amusement Park in Sandusky, Ohio with dear friends Ryan and Chris (who recently left to serve their missions for the church) … They met up with LDS girl friends from Cleveland and had the time of their lives! …The three musketeers later planned a wild river rafting trip into West Virginia with 15 more of their friends, the focus being on GIRLS … And Jon, Mr. Good Dad, drove Cam, Ashley and friends to Six Flags/Sea World to meet up with a ga-zillion LDS friends again for another day of merriment and mayhem! … In October Jon once again drove Cam and friends to Cleveland for a concert which they missed in Pgh due to it being held on a Sunday … I think this dad Cam has is to die for! … Just another sexy going bald guy who fits right in with the crowd! … OOPS! … Sorry Jon – I meant sexy TALL guy!

BUG BITES … She still has the fever - for music that is! … Ashley has benefited greatly from studying private voice and continuing with her piano lessons … She was selected to sing a solo in her schools spring choral concert and variety show but experienced her greatest excitement when auditioning for our community musical revue! … She sang her unusual, upbeat version of “Over the Rainbow” and knocked their socks off! … Needless to say the audience went wild over the diverse vocal and instrumental numbers … Having our dear friends and next door neighbors, Jimmy & Grace S., attend was icing on the cake!

CHAUFFEURED LIMOUSINE … Well not quite … But after the van bit the dust I’ve enjoyed buzzing around in my little bright red, look at me don’t I think I’m cool, (nope) spit fire on wheels … And as Cam always says “Stop signs are st-optional” … Yeah right … Tell that to a cop who’s chomping at the bit to write up a ticket! … Ash and I enjoy many fun girls outings! … And Cam traveled with me to one of my management training workshops in New York … What a RIOT to spend a couple of days with my son on the run! … Beyond dining out, his running, my mall hopping and late night chit chat we also took an incredible journey to Palmyra to visit the Sacred Grove and the Hill Comorah! … Usually we are there with the masses from around the world during pageant season but this trip we were able to spend solitary time on a pristine, winter day arm in arm in the grove reflecting on our many blessings! … We will treasure this special memory of our time together, as a mother and son, throughout eternity!

CHIP DIP … What fun we’ve had with many dear friends throughout the year! … A few highlights included; hanging out at track meets and XC invitationals … BBQ’s on the deck with flaming snowballs and making pioneer babies in a cradle (hankies) … Laughing over college adventures, dates and former friends we’ve had in common and didn’t know it until 27 years later! … Farewells and luncheons … Labor Day picnic and hike in the woods with our brood of kids … Parties, brunches, lunches and it appears that everything revolves around food! …Hooking up with our Rocky Mountain Denver friends and Idaho spuds from Idaho Falls … How fortunate we have been throughout the years to have so many wonderful friends who bless our lives in ways they will never know!

SKY SCRAPERS … Jon and Cam spent three days in NYC for a father-son outing prior to sending Cam off to college as Jon put it (that’s why we girls weren’t invited! Humph!) … Cam ran in the national Footlocker Invitational again in the Bronx … And other than being stripped searched in Times Square, mugged on the subway and stampeded by the masses on the corner of 49^th and Broadway they survived! (Just kidding! But that’s what many people think happens to you while in the big apple, ha ha) … They actually had a terrific time dining at Jekyll & Hyde, exploring one of their favorite cities at night and sharing a lot of guy talk!

NCAA REGULATIONS … Cam being a primary track recruit by colleges from South, East and West has been an eye opening experience for all of us! … Numbers of colleges have been interested in him but he whittled it down to his top 6 choices based on their premed program and student life as well as the diverse opportunities to run track and XC for a division one university … Itwas a hoot! … Being wined and dined has been lovely but for Cam attending his first frat party was interesting to say the least! The blitz continued with incredible scholarships being offered … He then proceeded to earnestly pray seeking guidance so as to know which school would be the best fit for him … The decision was difficult to say the least but with great excitement and a peaceful heart he jubilantly announced his choice thereby signing on the dotted line! … At this stage in his young life a major personal decision such as this will surely affect his future profoundly! … We are VERY proud of Cam and his level of maturity!

THE BIG PICTURE … Well, I missed my slow boat to China … Publishers Clearing House got lost in the mail … A New York cabbie stole my Emmy … The Steelers snatched back my retired jersey … That actor, what’s his name, keeps taking credit for MY line “Dy-no-mite!” and Jon thinks he married Britney Spears by mistake while in a foggy Las Vegas haze! … What’s next … Emotional detox?! … A ration on those card board tasting tacos at Ling Chows take out?! … A make over gone bad with Botox?! … Well, as I’ve always said … “LIFE is an EXTRAORDINARY adventure!” … And hey Bubba we’ve had a grand ride this year- no regrets! … Life’s twists and turns keep us humble and eagerly anticipating what’s around the next corner! ... Did I hear diamond mines in our future? … A home in the Caribbean perhaps? … A best selling novel with my name on it? … NOPE! … Jon says, “Pittsburgh rules and being destitute is in style!” … I say middle age should come with go-go boots, a full head of hair and a year’s supply of cheese wiz! … Pipe dreams! … But at least I get to hang out every day with my best friend of 27 years! … From zero to insanity in .05 seconds – that’s us!! … I rock, he rolls and where we go NOBODY knows! … Yip-eeeee! J

We wish each of you a magical Christmas season and a thriving personal relationship with God our eternal Father and with His son Jesus Christ, our savior and elder brother. May you also enjoy continued love and success throughout the New Year!